Punk-Ass Book Jockey

Toronto Christmas bookbuying public update!

Today I had one lady buy all our copies of "The Multiorgasmic Man" for Christmas presents, and another buy all our copies of "A Grief Observed", presumably for the same reason.

I amuse myself by thinking that they are going to the same recipients.

I 'phoned a customer last week to tell her that her book was in, and her name was... Myfanwy!

I was hoping that I'd be there when she came in to pick it up, so I could see if she looked slightly pterodactyl-ish... but alas, I missed her.

I missed the part where y'all discussed, in shocked and titillated voices, how Daniel Radcliffe is going to be starring in Equus next month.

So I discussed it, with shock and titillation, at work (well away from the kids section, since I don't want to, y'know, emotionally scar any wee ones).

"It's a wise career move," said co-worker S-. "His people probably told him he needed a drastic change."

"Man, I wish bookselling allowed drastic changes like that," I said, ruefully, having spent the day removing "Display Only!" stickers with various dangerous, fire-starting, eye-watering solvents.

S- narrowed his eyes. "So you're saying... we should try being naked."

(beat of horrified silence on everyone's parts)

S-: "Have you seen us?"

Perhaps I should have spent more time protesting, ("No! Only clothed! And hey! I look good naked, thank you very much!") but I was busy peeing myself with laughter.

Also, this conversation came directly after a conversation about what tactics we could use to stop people from going down the street to the new, extremely shifty second-hand/remainder bookstore. I think "naked clerks!" wins as worst added-value idea ever.

I have Been Away, flist, and am now back, and oh, I missed you all.

I have to sort out my current internet access problem. Dial-up is stupid. Buying dial-up in tokens of 20 hours in embarrassingly dumb. And working at a job where the boss has made you sign an agreement that you will be fired if you check your email at work is also dumb.

Anyway, the confluence of dumbness has kept me offline for two weeks. It is now Saturday evening and I finally gave in and bought more tokens and am now sitting with a bottle of wine reading back the hundreds of posts on my flist that I missed.

And am going to go make brownies in a minute. Mmm. Brownies. In short, this is a fairly perfect day. Also? There's a knitting store a five minute walk from my house which I did not know about. Five minutes.

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Things I have done these past two weeks instead of read fanfic, since I was cut-off from fandom goodness:

1. Ziplisted a lot of David Thewlis and David Hewlett movies. (I was also looking for Two Girls and a Guy, out of curiousity, but it seems that zip.ca does na' have it. I have a feeling that I am probably better off. And I'm still waffling about whether to watch Slither.)

Mike Leigh's Naked was difficult. I gave up, actually, 3/4 of the way through. Criterion pick and critical praise notwithstanding, I made a decision a while ago that I was going to stop watching films where women got sexually assaulted or killed in order to further the storyline of a male protagonist. Thewlis was very convincing, and certainly earned the Cannes accolades that the film received, but I still don't want to see it again.

(I did, however, find the werewolf comments early in the film pretty hilarious.)

By contrast, Treed Murray, which I watched yesterday, was fantastic. It's unsettling but eventually redemptive and the storytelling is awesome and I absolutely adore ensemble pieces where no-one is good or bad or eclipsed. And the pacing was great and the cuts were great and Hewlett was great and that Ashmore kid was surprisingly awesome. Also, it ended at precisely the right time. Y'all should go rent it. It's a very satisfying film.

2. Re-read Anthony Robbins' "Awaken The Giant Within". It's been remaindered at my store, which I find sad, but it meant that I could buy a copy for $3.19. I find Tony inspiring. Also, the last time I tried to read a "design your best life!" book, I found myself covering my eyes and reading between my fingers, totally involuntarily, so the fact that I managed this one--in a normal, sane, fashion--is promising.

3. Obtained seemingly hundreds of root vegetables, which I have no idea what to do with.

4. Neglected to honour my mother's self-imposed state of denial about the fact that my sister and her boyfriend are living together and yes, sleeping in the same bed. I feel kind of bad about this one. Jess and I have agreed to let her be happy and deluded, but then I had to go and say "no no, I don't need that extra bedframe you've got, but Jess and Matt would probably like to get the mattress they're sleeping on off of the floor."

5. Have bizarre "terrorists are buying books at our store!" problems. $2500 email orders for bio-chemistry textbooks and rocket engineering tomes to be delivered to tenements in Montreal, to be paid for by obviously stolen credit cards. Totally uninterested RCMP officers. When a plague descends on Quebec, I won't be surprised. I tried to stop the apocalypse, flist, I really did.
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Okay. Brownies now.