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merrilyI can't write HP fanfic, and that pisses me off.
I remind myself, when I am attempting to do so and notice steam coming out of my ears, that I loved Firefly fanfic for a good six months before I started writing it, and even then, my first attempt (online because I like the Canary class workships that mine outerspace) was a rather palid Mal/Inara. I mean, jeesh, what a load of go-si. (Or whatever. I can't be arsed to go over to the Firefly Pinyin Dictionary and look it up, but I mean the Chinese word for shit, okay?) Mal/Inara? Not only (*pained*) is Joss already working on that pairing, Mal/Simon is much more interesting (what with all the punching), Mal/River is exponentially sexier (the wrongness!), and I was converted to Jayne/Kaylee firmly and for all time after reading Belasera's incandescently hot Slim As Dimes (go read it now!).
So now I mostly write Mal/River, though I'm not married to the pairing. [What does OTP stand for, anyway? Hi, I'm new.] I'm surprised by this, since I'm more like Simon. But Nathan Fillion provided us with a massively accessible Mal, and I love the enormous potential of River, who has a mesmerizing grace (thank you, Summer Glau) and who's the best of Buffy without her whininess or penchant for elaborate and impractical-for-fighting outfits. Plus, River's crazy, and I totally understand her resulting voice, where half of the information isn't spoken outloud because she's already made those connections and forgets that her listeners probably haven't. (This is also why my jokes always fall flat.)
The trouble with HP fanfic, though, is that the pairing I love is Remus/Sirius, and the era I love best is MWPP, since that's when most of the found-you-for-the-first-time fics happen. Which is all well and good, but I'm not a boy, and I didn't really play with boys while growing up (my brothers being 12 years younger than I), and the Marauders have the kind of shocking rough-and-tumble thing that only boys do. Plus, sometimes they're really rude, and while child-me revelled in dirty jokes too (I told one with the punchline "I bit it off" repeatedly at Girl Guide camp), there's a kind of rude dirtyness that seems particular to boys, and I have no deep understanding of that, either.
So when I try writing R/S, Remus is really more like me as a kid. And I totally don't accept a 12-year old Remus who is all sensitive & crap, 'cause I've now watched my brothers being 12 and the mystery is gone. They're both extremely talented and intelligent teenagers and C is wildly precocious, but C also kisses his biceps when no one's was looking and shoved his first single armpit hair (attached to his armpit) proudly into the face of anyone whom he could corner. Both he and J had to be forcibly pushed under the showerhead in order to achieve some semblance of hygiene. They might've pranked voraciously and with glee, but I wasn't around to watch.
Anyway, it's been an hour since I started writing this rant, and I've now convinced myself that I'm over-reacting, so I'm going to go read some Captain Underpants books and find a non-creepy way to watch kids in the park, and, armed with that knowledge, I'll try an R/S pairing again, later.
I remind myself, when I am attempting to do so and notice steam coming out of my ears, that I loved Firefly fanfic for a good six months before I started writing it, and even then, my first attempt (online because I like the Canary class workships that mine outerspace) was a rather palid Mal/Inara. I mean, jeesh, what a load of go-si. (Or whatever. I can't be arsed to go over to the Firefly Pinyin Dictionary and look it up, but I mean the Chinese word for shit, okay?) Mal/Inara? Not only (*pained*) is Joss already working on that pairing, Mal/Simon is much more interesting (what with all the punching), Mal/River is exponentially sexier (the wrongness!), and I was converted to Jayne/Kaylee firmly and for all time after reading Belasera's incandescently hot Slim As Dimes (go read it now!).
So now I mostly write Mal/River, though I'm not married to the pairing. [What does OTP stand for, anyway? Hi, I'm new.] I'm surprised by this, since I'm more like Simon. But Nathan Fillion provided us with a massively accessible Mal, and I love the enormous potential of River, who has a mesmerizing grace (thank you, Summer Glau) and who's the best of Buffy without her whininess or penchant for elaborate and impractical-for-fighting outfits. Plus, River's crazy, and I totally understand her resulting voice, where half of the information isn't spoken outloud because she's already made those connections and forgets that her listeners probably haven't. (This is also why my jokes always fall flat.)
The trouble with HP fanfic, though, is that the pairing I love is Remus/Sirius, and the era I love best is MWPP, since that's when most of the found-you-for-the-first-time fics happen. Which is all well and good, but I'm not a boy, and I didn't really play with boys while growing up (my brothers being 12 years younger than I), and the Marauders have the kind of shocking rough-and-tumble thing that only boys do. Plus, sometimes they're really rude, and while child-me revelled in dirty jokes too (I told one with the punchline "I bit it off" repeatedly at Girl Guide camp), there's a kind of rude dirtyness that seems particular to boys, and I have no deep understanding of that, either.
So when I try writing R/S, Remus is really more like me as a kid. And I totally don't accept a 12-year old Remus who is all sensitive & crap, 'cause I've now watched my brothers being 12 and the mystery is gone. They're both extremely talented and intelligent teenagers and C is wildly precocious, but C also kisses his biceps when no one's was looking and shoved his first single armpit hair (attached to his armpit) proudly into the face of anyone whom he could corner. Both he and J had to be forcibly pushed under the showerhead in order to achieve some semblance of hygiene. They might've pranked voraciously and with glee, but I wasn't around to watch.
Anyway, it's been an hour since I started writing this rant, and I've now convinced myself that I'm over-reacting, so I'm going to go read some Captain Underpants books and find a non-creepy way to watch kids in the park, and, armed with that knowledge, I'll try an R/S pairing again, later.
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(no subject)
Date: 2006-04-17 12:12 am (UTC)If it helps, the thing is, twelve-year old boys? Are pretty much exactly like seventeen-and-eighteen-and-nineteen year old boys. Even the quiet, studious ones can get rough and tumble. My best male friend is crazy intelligent, mature, and wonderful, but at the same time, he and his best friend routinely throw each other into walls. I'm like, "Hey, Sam, where's that giant bruise from?" And he's like, "Oh, Blake and I were wrestling and he pushed me into a chair."
So, hm, teenage boys wrestle a lot, touch each other constantly, and they find anything relating to bodily humor or sex really funny. Plus, if there's a way to make even the most innocuous statement filthy, they'll do it.
And that, I think, pretty much summarizes Sirius. ;)
ta
Date: 2006-04-17 10:40 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-05-02 02:00 am (UTC)One True Pair
ah!
Date: 2006-05-02 03:00 pm (UTC)Useful, but good god.
Re: ah!
Date: 2006-05-02 03:12 pm (UTC)Heh. It is a bit gooey, isn't it?